2012 has brought so much change to our family. A lot of change. A new baby. Two new jobs for Christian. Adjusting to being a working mom for me. Cole is changing daily. He’s trending towards teenage years and moving further and further away from simple kid years. Hormones are kicking in (Cole’s and mine). Health worries for our families. Top that off with our favorite things to do – running (me), kayak fishing (Christian – for this month at least), swimming (Cole – for this season at least), and non-stop movement (Chet – hoping he holds off on walking as long as possible). Simply put, it’s a lot. I have had a lot of moments where I needed a deep cleansing out breath.
In the hustle and bustle of 2012, things have slipped through the cracks. I’ve forgotten to send Cole to school with lunch money. I’ve fallen a sleep without saying I love you to Christian. I’ve forgotten to wash diapers. Nothing was planned for dinner. As life has become more emotionally heavy, it’s starting to spill out into other aspects of life. Instead of being consumed by it all, I’m working on focusing what is manageable. But in all this hustle and bustle, I have moments when I start to feel a little less valued at home and Christian has moments when he starts to feel a little less loved. It happens when all the above is going on. It’s not perfect. I can get messy. But we are working together to be more aware.
This brings me to Post-Its –
I planned on writing a collection of I love you most… post-its for Christian. I planned on being sneaky and sticky one in his car or in his lunch. He could find one after work or before bed. I planned on keeping the post-its going for at least a week.
On a Friday night when he was stuck in traffic on his commute home, I pulled them out of my purse. I would stick one on the front door. Cole, my always observant child, asked what I was doing. I told him Christian could use some extra loving, and I thought it would be nice to remind him of all the reasons I love him. My post-it plan just got a new direction. Cole wanted to play a long. He grabbed a handful of blank post-its and started to write all the reason he too loved Christian. He started decorating our entire house. Soon we had dozens of post-its in every room. Chet wanted to play a long too, so in his best baby babble, he wrote a few for Christian also.
It was a hit. I’m certain Christian felt loved when he walked into our house that Friday night.
Last night was another crazy night in our house. Nothing seemed to settle once we were all 4 under the same roof. Chet was exhausted. When he gets tired, he gets noisy and mean. When Chet gets noisy, Cole gets crazy. It’s in these moments that he wants to Open Gundam Style for the 100th time. He wants to ask a million what-if questions. It is sensory overload for anyone in the room. Because I can’t tell Chet to stop, I tend to expect Cole to behave. He is old enough to understand, but it isn’t always fair. He shouldn’t always have to be the one child who can’t have a crazy moment.
That night, as I tucked him into bed later than usual, he looked at me and said I need a post-it. You need a what? I’m not feeling loved. I need a post-it.
So tonight after he goes to sleep, I’ll be tucking a post-it into his book bag. When he gets off the bus, a post-it will be waiting for him on the front door. I’m not sure if I’ve created a monster or a wonderful fun new family tradition….
Either way our family sure is full of love. And I could fill up pack after pack of post-its on why I love all of them. I’m hoping I can start buying them in bulk!
(Proof of the crazy: I published this post with the year as 2013! and seriously couldn’t remember what year it is.)